The First Step To Reclaim Your Life

When surrounded by haze and fog the future can seem bleak. How to proceed to get beyond being overwhelmed is not an uncommon experience. Even in the midst of emotional turmoil so many things lead to misunderstanding one’s environment; Vision is at best clouded, often by the fear of not knowing how to handle what needs to be changed. Many of them are obvious but approach so fast at the same time that they become blind spots that gets larger as paralysis develops, diverting our attention from its course.

Specific details are unimportant. All that is certain is that it starts with a loss of self confidence that leads to inhibitions, maladaptive behavior and the tendency to form co-dependent relationships. But being overextended by everything that needs change is just a distraction from realizing The First Step: Find your way in your own life to rediscover the self-confidence that has been lost; examine your boundaries as an individual and develop the time you need for yourself to feel fulfilled. These are all related, and being focused on them will help reveal where adjustments are critical. Once the power of The First Step has begun, current perspective will no longer be the same and what was feared will be less threatening and embraced more as challenges. When this has been accomplished behavior will adapt, then the second step will appear as a reflection of how thought has been transformed.

Perhaps this has been oversimplified, so obvious that it seems contrived, but it’s easy to forget something so basic and fundamental that its hard not wonder how so many people have neglected it, and lost their way.

Finding the place where confidence resides may need the assistance of someone who has the ability to be objective and say what needs to be said at the right moment and has enough trust to be credible. Timing is crucial, as anyone who has struggled with being in this position can identify. Giving good advice has to be based on the right motive recognizing that withholding it can also be appropriate when unhealthy dependency develops. This assumes that help has been asked for however it has been communicated.

The First Step is not as easy as it sounds. It requires the ability to learn how to be assertive about one’s boundaries and firmly convey limits with conviction. The quest is to reclaim the power of self confidence because somehow it has been lost and anxiety in the presence of uncertainty increases. This is especially true in co-dependent relationships and the most difficult thing to see when involved in one.

Trying to deal with everything at the same time, perhaps hoping that time itself will somehow show the solution is not as reliable as recognizing that rediscovering lost self confidence needs to be aggressively sought and affirmed, defining an essential ingredient of empowerment, a worthy first step without wasting time worrying about things so far ahead that they are impossible to anticipate from current perspective.

As part of a sequence each step is an outgrowth of the one’s before, and mastering them as they present is a reasonable way to make everything more manageable, and perhaps inspiring the outcome by eliminating irrational fear. Each step will transform the self by validating the time spent searching for what has been lost, fundamental self confidence.