On Surrender

No Surrender - movie posterWhen I think about Surrender, it’s usually in terms of war. Perhaps on a personal level, it has a different meaning not associated with giving in, but a conscious level of “acceptance” that whatever conflict I’m resisting needs to be re-examined.

It is possible that I no longer want to be in this struggle. If I resist giving it a second or third look because I feel it would be a sign of weakness, how will I ever be flexible enough to say “I’m tired of this, I want to get off the merry go round, and change the venue I have so rigidly defined as the measure of my strength.”

It’s not a question of submission, but rather a sign of my ability to accept that I am on a course that is only leading to a wasteful expenditure of energy and emotion. Would it not be in my best interest to stop, look and listen to what I am involved in, and reconsider my objective? Or simply continue on a path that leads to wasteful loss that has failure as the inevitable conclusion which I refuse to acknowledge because of my pride?

Often the reason these struggles begin have, over time, changed. Perhaps the conditions that I now find myself in, no longer exist or possibly I have forgotten the reasons they originated. In any event, is it a sign of “failure” to go back and re-examine the conflict? To see if my initial goal is still what I want or a sign of strength, perhaps wisdom, to finally say “I can’t continue this, I want to let go and move on to something worth struggling for.” Is it possible to say this without seeing it as the instinctive shortcoming I am so loath to acknowledge?

* image taken from No Surrender – a movie by Richard James Allen and Karen Pearlman.